August

~~footnote...there will be no more text messages between UP and the HBs, as he has chosen to no longer be a part of our lives. Mom has bravely stepped up to the plate and "adopted" the guys.~~
What an awesome drive home I had. Unbeknownst to Mom, I stashed the guys in PA and gave them a map to her house. It was so nice to hear nothing but the sound of the wind whipping through my hair and the music nice and loud. Nobody kicking my seat, no Speedos flying out of the window, no hairy gumdrops bouncing around in the backseat.
I guess they finally reappeared the beginning of the month, just in time for Mom to be housesitting for the neighbors...who just so happen to have a pool. One warm night, the guys decided they were too hot, so they started swinging around on Mom's ceiling fan. For reasons I can't comprehend, she decided to take them to the neighbor's pool...despite my tales of mayhem at the YMCA. They went crazy!!! They were running around, throwing their Speedos in the pool, getting them out, putting them on their head and running around the yard. With Speedos on their heads, they decided to put their goggles on what we call their "mussel muscle"...kind of hard to see that way, so needless to say, there were several incidences of tree collisions, falls into the pool and getting tangled in the fence. I'm still not sure what she was thinking.

The next night, she was making some zucchini bread and when she went to put it in the oven, received a fairly major shock. Four little hairy bastards were laying on the oven racks, as naked as jaybirds, getting warm. They told her they were cold and drying their Speedos.